The Eternal Question
What are your eternal questions… mine are :
“Should I redo my highlights ?” – I can’t figure out if I like myself better as a blonde or brunette.
“What are we eating ?” – at any time of the day.
“Should I save up for an actual trip, or just go back to LA ?” – usually the latter.
“What’s going on ?” – because I don’t really pay attention, even if I pretend to.
“Why’s that person looking at me ?” – I’m a mix of paranoid & introvert.
And so on… 🙂
“Be brutally honest but lead with the positive, because I might shut down and not be able to process the criticism.”
“Tout homme d’élite aspire instinctivement à sa tour d’ivoire, à sa réclusion mystérieuse, où il est délivré de la masse, du vulgaire, du grand nombre, où il peut oublier la règle « homme », étant lui-même une exception à cette règle.”
“Every select man strives instinctively for a citadel and its privacy, where he seeks mysterious seclusion, where he can be delivered from the many people and their commonness – where he may forget “men who are the rule,” as being the exception to that case.”
Friedrich Nietzsche
“I don’t understand, is it a millennial thing ? This need to
share everything with the world ?”
There’s so many articles, tweets, and posts online about millennials… being part of that generation, I don’t exactly grasp why there’s such an obsession about our values & behavior – but at the same time, I know we’re totally iconic.
Yes, I am being sarcastic right now. I was recently advised to stop sharing my life, and accused of being a narcissist because I kept a blog as a diary… and somehow that gave the right to that person to paint me as self-centered.
Although I cannot agree because I know that this has always just been a cool hobby to me, and it’s whatever, not that serious. I was still deeply affected by that hater speech, which compromised my true personality and made me out to be someone I’ve never been.
But I get it, “millennials are like gluten, nobody really knows what they are but everybody loves to hate them”. The funniest part in that quote is that I check both cases, because I’m also intolerant to gluten… which is great.
I’m probably gonna start adulting soon (I hope… it’s another joke), and put my mind back on serious work, but in the meantime, I will not accept anyone tell me how to process my feelings for example. At the end of the day, I know myself best and I know what’s right for me.
So thank you for good feedback, but no thank you if it’s just trying to ruin my mood.
Should we let others dictate how we look…
I go back & worth with that question in mind – assuming your boyfriend likes your hair a certain way, or color, should you actually keep it that way only to please him ? Even though, it might not be a true reflection of who you are, or want to be.
I feel like for women, anything that has to do with our looks is so important to us, because that’s how we express ourselves. The patriarchal society tends to repress women’s freedom, voice and of course their appearance.
Most men will not understand how it is an every day challenge for a woman to let herself be. They’ve been raised in an unfair world that benefits them, so they think even how a woman keeps their hair or dresses up, is a due to them.
The reality that needs to be spoken out, is that it’s not. Women have let themselves be submissive over the generations, mostly out of a survival instinct. Which is totally comprehensible… we are also the nurturing souls, and if we cannot please a man enough, then how are we supposed to birth families.
But we are not slaves to their needs. We have to listen to what we want, because they don’t. If you like yourself the way you are, then stop listening to whoever is trying to change you to benefit them. You’re going to end up like a broken doll that doesn’t even recognize who they are anymore.
Your mom did not give you life, so that you would sacrifice it to an underserving man. You are not the victim to women’s past. You will rise for yourself, and for us, and we will put an end in time to men suffocating us. Be proud to be a woman, and act strongly by choosing what suits you.
I can’t stop eating, the food in Paris is freaking delicious
I didn’t have the best of days… I got a pretty severe anxiety attack at work this afternoon. Which was totally random, and I didn’t really know what was causing it, but the more I think about it & I realize it’s because of all the unnecessary pressure I am putting on my shoulders – I meditated to get me through it.
I love that I have people that believe in me, because at some point I stopped believing in myself, and that makes me sad… unfortunely some have what may seem like high expectations. I’m just trying my best, and I can’t be who I’m not. I know what makes me happy, and what doesn’t, and I don’t want to force myself to go against my spirits. Because that’s actually how you destroy yourself, and I’m in a healing process.
All I know is, I am getting back on my feet. You can’t imagine the feeling of sensing my being been born again. I just hope I will make some proud… sometimes I feel like you’re kinda the only ones who care about my journey, on this blog or whatever – and I need to thank you for that.
Madison Kennedy 